As the other half of this polyamourous marriage, I felt it was only fair that I get to play along in talking about our experiences. So here I am, an official contributor!
As hubby said in his introductory post, we’ve been thinking about non traditional marriage structures for years; actually before we were evening married! The first time he and I talked about it in any serious way was after going to the theater to see Kinsey. At the time, we both expressed an interest in it from an intellectual stand point, but I believe neither felt secure enough in a barely 2 year old relationship to entertain the notion in any serious fashion.
As the years passed, we faced several situations that led us to revisit the topic and discuss it over and over again. We briefly explored the swinging scene and just did not find what we were looking for there.
Polyamory appeared to us as un-attainable ideal for many years; that is until recently. Hubby has always had a penchant for beautiful relationships where he is surrounded by love and many supporters, all living under the same roof. I have an unquenchable desire to be held, loved, flirted with etc but I also really like my own space. Are the two goals mutually exclusive? I for one don’t believe so. We both have a lot to give in return and once we accepted that we didn’t have to mimic each others paths, that’s when we realized that polyamory could very well give us both what we so dearly sought. Why should we limit our marriage and each other with self imposed arbitrary rules in a lifestyle that by its very nature defies traditional definitions? We both want and need different things; we’ve decided to embrace that.
There are a lot of topics I look forward to addressing; jealousy/compersion, “coming out”, dealing with the emotional roller-coaster, connecting with like minded people.
Love and beauty are what make my life so rich. My hope is that by being open and honest and vocal about our choices in life, we will attract the types of friends and supporters that otherwise would never have had the chance to find us.
[...] awakening has been becoming polyamorous. Like I discussed, in my very first post on this blog Wifey Gets her Say, it’s been a long time coming. Since we’ve become active polys, I have discovered [...]